Dirty Sharon, you know - the barmaid from the Bulls head, the one who`s always showing her....

stock of "fudges and cheesey wotits off" to...

all and sundry, the infamous bodysnatchers from...

Barnstable and Whipsnade pantomime group , who strangely enough were rehearsing a play about Mary Russett and her flexible gusset, which she uses to catch.....

the number 72 bus which was an express and took her to

absolute ecstacy, every time it drove over a speed hump due to a defective.....

Orgasmatron rebound device (early series - Italian) which happened to be situated directly beneath her....

size 12 jackboots that had once belonged to a close family friend called jason, he'd left them behind when he found out that tomato soup contained....

squirrel shit as well as an unknown ingredient that made you feel like ..........

you was feasting on cheesey wotsits and fudge ( is there a theme here???) however the jack boots were found to be not of the dr marten kind, but of the cheep 70's styleee ones ya mam wanted you to wear by "major domo" remember?? who use to be.....

a transgender jock strap designer, who after being made redundant from british leyland set up his/her own business, making clinical support trusses for injured........

elvis impersonators, who regularly attend the annual meeting at Blackpool wearing.......

the latest designer Burberry gimp suits from...

Chavs 'R' Us, but this year Blackpool was fully booked so they had to go to...............

southport, where they blended in nicely, so much so, they were mistaken for.....

Scooterists intending to attend the day do at marton mere in blackpool!!!!! but after finding it was £5 to attend here aswell they took off their underwear to......

throw at at jonny boland and.......

dance to joy divison who have a habbit of...

getting their nadgers caught every time they...

go to blackpool, but seeing as jimmy saville, that well known manchester gangster and local radio celebrity (some say) no longer has control of the taxi ride for kids to blackpool " ows about that then" they had to find.....

Alternative transport in the form of Betty Swallocks and her amazing inflatable

Zeppelin which could carry 50 people, 1 cow, 2 sheep and 100 hundredweight of............

extra absorbant Tenor Lady panty liners just in case the...

hooded claw turned up unannounced in order to.....

distribute copies of the Watchmakers weekly and Brijax's photographs of.....

nude ladys on scooters doing...

a spot of underground ballooning.
Whilst he was distributing these articles a loud crash was heard. The roof had fallen in and in the middle of all the rubble was.................

Herman the gimp. The once faithful companion of...

Nellie no knickers the famous flying farter who's favourite trick was.....

levitating over Herman's face by emitting short bursts of sprout induced methane from her...